PART 13 – I Had Never Thought to Ask Grandma About Her Money, and Now I Couldn’t Stop Wondering What Else I Had Failed to Understand

I used to believe that knowing someone for years meant you understood them.

I don't believe that anymore.

The check had made that much clear.

I knew my grandmother's handwriting.

I knew the sound of her voice and the place she held in my life.

But I hadn't known she could write a check for six million dollars.

That fact sat between everything I remembered and everything I was trying to understand.

I kept thinking about how easily I had accepted my own assumptions.

Grandma had never seemed wealthy to me.

I had never looked at her and imagined a person capable of making a financial decision on that scale.

Perhaps I had never bothered to ask the right questions.

Perhaps there had never been a reason to ask them.

Either way, I was left with the same problem.

I knew what she had done.

I didn't know why.

The bank had given me its initial assessment, but the transaction still required additional verification.

Edward Collins had explained the process carefully.

I understood the reasons.

I also understood that no amount of worrying would make the bank finish its work sooner.

That didn't stop me from thinking about it.

Six million dollars was too large a figure to leave in the back of my mind.

It kept returning when I was trying to concentrate on something else.

I would think about the amount, then remember the signature.

Then I would remember the other recipients.

My parents.

Eric.

Olivia.

Aunt Diane.

Uncle Martin.

The list had become familiar.

The reason behind it hadn't.

I wondered whether Grandma had considered how each of us would react.

Had she expected us to accept the checks without question?

Had she anticipated that some of us might be uncomfortable?

Had she understood how difficult it would be to know what to do with such an unexpected gift?

I couldn't answer any of those questions.

I had no reason to assume she had overlooked the consequences.

I had no reason to assume she had planned for every one of them, either.

I was trying to understand a decision without knowing the thoughts behind it.

That was a mistake I kept making.

I wanted to fill the gaps because the gaps bothered me.

But an explanation didn't become true simply because it made the situation easier to understand.

I had to keep reminding myself of that.

The facts were still limited.

The account existed.

The signature matched the bank's records.

The available funds were sufficient to cover the check.

The bank needed to complete its review.

That was what I knew from the conversation with Edward.

Everything else was something I needed to learn rather than imagine.

I thought about calling Grandma.

Then I remembered that I hadn't established whether I would get an answer that resolved anything.

Even if I could ask her directly, I would still need to be willing to hear whatever she had to say.

That was an uncomfortable thought.

I had been so focused on getting an explanation that I hadn't considered how much my own expectations might shape the way I heard it.

I wanted a reason that made sense to me.

But my grandmother wasn't obligated to have made her decision according to the assumptions I had built around her.

I had to leave room for that possibility.

For years, I had seen her through the ordinary details of our relationship.

I hadn't considered how much of her life might exist outside those details.

Now I was looking at a check that challenged my understanding of her circumstances.

It didn't tell me everything.

It didn't even tell me the most important thing I wanted to know.

But it reminded me that I had never possessed the complete picture.

I had simply become comfortable with the one I had.

There was a difference.

I wasn't proud of how long it had taken me to recognize it.

Still, I was beginning to understand that the check wasn't just a financial document I needed the bank to examine.

It was also a reason to question the certainty with which I had described someone I loved.

I didn't know what I would discover next.

I didn't know when the bank would complete its work.

And I didn't know whether the answers I wanted would be simple or difficult.

For once, I tried not to decide in advance.

I had spent enough time making guesses.

I needed to let the facts speak first.

Click here to continue reading: PART 14: The Bank Had Given Me Reasons to Trust the Check, but I Still Had to Learn the Difference Between Trusting a Document and Understanding Its Meaning