PART 5 – I Left the Bank Knowing the Check Was Probably Real, but I Still Couldn’t Explain What Grandma Had Been Thinking

I kept seeing the check whenever I closed my eyes.

Not the amount alone.

The handwriting.

I knew it was hers, and that made the whole thing harder to dismiss.

I had spent years thinking of Grandma as someone whose life I understood.

Now I wasn't so sure.

I didn't know what to do with that feeling.

I also didn't know how to explain it to anyone else.

Six million dollars was a number people could understand.

The uncertainty behind it was harder to describe.

The bank had given me a reasonable explanation for the delay.

The transaction needed more verification.

That was all.

I tried to keep the facts separate from the questions forming in my mind.

The account existed.

The signature matched the bank's records.

The funds were sufficient.

The final approval had not happened yet.

I repeated those points until they felt less strange.

It helped a little.

Not enough.

I had to remind myself that I wasn't the only person involved.

My parents had received a check.

So had Eric and Olivia.

Aunt Diane and Uncle Martin had received checks, too.

Whatever Grandma had decided, she had included the whole group.

I wondered whether any of them had already started making plans.

The thought made me uncomfortable.

I had no idea what the others were doing, and I didn't want to assume they were reacting as I was.

Some people might have felt excited.

Others might have been suspicious.

Someone might have taken the check as a sign that Grandma wanted to change something in the family.

I didn't know.

I wasn't even sure what I thought myself.

I had spent years teaching students to distinguish what a story actually said from what a reader imagined it meant.

It seemed unfair that I was now struggling to follow my own advice.

I had a check.

I had a bank manager's explanation.

I had six names connected to the same unexpected decision.

Everything beyond that remained uncertain.

I wanted to call someone and talk about it.

Then I wondered what I would say.

Would I tell them that the bank had confirmed the check was legitimate?

That wouldn't be completely accurate yet, because the review was still underway.

Would I say the money was mine?

That would be premature.

Would I tell them I thought Grandma had a reason for giving the checks?

Of course she had a reason.

But I didn't know what it was.

That was the part I couldn't get past.

I knew my grandmother had made a decision.

I knew the decision involved money on a scale I had never associated with her.

I knew she had included several members of our family.

I didn't know why.

And I didn't want to fill the silence with a story of my own invention.

For now, I decided to wait.

The bank would finish its work when it was able to.

I would deal with the facts as they became available.

It wasn't a satisfying plan.

It was the only honest one I had.

Click here to continue reading: PART 6: I Wanted Someone to Tell Me What the Checks Meant, but Every Explanation I Imagined Raised Another Question