By the time the investigator returned, I had stopped trying to count the hours.<\/p>\n
Everything seemed to happen between medical checks.<\/p>\n
Someone came to examine Paige.<\/p>\n
Someone asked a question.<\/p>\n
Someone wrote something down.<\/p>\n
Then we waited again.<\/p>\n
I had never understood how exhausting waiting could be.<\/p>\n
Not when the person you were waiting for was a six-month-old baby in a hospital bed.<\/p>\n
I was sitting beside Paige when a nurse approached.<\/p>\n
She told me the investigator wanted to speak with me again.<\/p>\n
I looked toward the diaper bag.<\/p>\n
I had a feeling I knew what she would ask about.<\/p>\n
The bag had been sitting near my chair since we arrived.<\/p>\n
It looked exactly as it had that morning.<\/p>\n
Same shape.<\/p>\n
Same strap.<\/p>\n
Same ordinary appearance.<\/p>\n
I had carried it without thinking.<\/p>\n
Now it seemed like one of the few objects that connected Kate's house to mine and then to the hospital.<\/p>\n
I asked whether Paige would be all right while I stepped away.<\/p>\n
The nurse assured me that she was being cared for.<\/p>\n
I nodded.<\/p>\n
Kate was sitting nearby.<\/p>\n
Ryan had returned.<\/p>\n
I didn't say much as I left.<\/p>\n
The investigator met me in the quieter room where we'd spoken before.<\/p>\n
She had the same notebook.<\/p>\n
She seemed just as calm.<\/p>\n
She asked how Paige was doing.<\/p>\n
I told her the doctors were still examining her.<\/p>\n
I explained that they'd found a fracture in her left leg and were concerned about another finding on the additional X-rays.<\/p>\n
The investigator nodded.<\/p>\n
Then she asked about the diaper bag.<\/p>\n
"Did your sister pack it that morning?"<\/p>\n
I thought carefully.<\/p>\n
"I don't know when it was packed."<\/p>\n
"Who handed it to you?"<\/p>\n
"Kate."<\/p>\n
"Did you see Ryan touch it?"<\/p>\n
"No."<\/p>\n
"Did you see anyone put anything inside?"<\/p>\n
"No."<\/p>\n
I looked down.<\/p>\n
I wished I had paid more attention.<\/p>\n
But why would I have?<\/p>\n
It had been a normal babysitting arrangement.<\/p>\n
Kate had brought a bag with Paige's things.<\/p>\n
I had accepted it.<\/p>\n
I hadn't expected to reconstruct every movement afterward.<\/p>\n
The investigator asked whether I had used anything from the bag before discovering the bruise.<\/p>\n
I told her I'd prepared a bottle.<\/p>\n
She asked where the bottle came from.<\/p>\n
I described what I remembered.<\/p>\n
Then she asked about the baby wipe.<\/p>\n
I explained that it was a clean wipe I used while checking Paige.<\/p>\n
She asked whether I'd kept it.<\/p>\n
I hesitated.<\/p>\n
I remembered placing it aside after seeing the makeup come away.<\/p>\n
Then I had been focused on getting Paige to the hospital.<\/p>\n
"I left it at my house."<\/p>\n
The investigator looked up.<\/p>\n
"Do you remember where?"<\/p>\n
"Near the changing table."<\/p>\n
She made a note.<\/p>\n
I felt a sudden rush of guilt.<\/p>\n
I hadn't thought about preserving anything.<\/p>\n
I had thought about the baby.<\/p>\n
Only the baby.<\/p>\n
I asked whether I should have brought the wipe.<\/p>\n
The investigator told me not to blame myself for seeking medical care.<\/p>\n
She asked me to describe exactly where I'd left it.<\/p>\n
I did.<\/p>\n
I explained that I hadn't used it again.<\/p>\n
I hadn't cleaned the rest of Paige's thigh.<\/p>\n
I hadn't tried to remove the makeup.<\/p>\n
I had simply stopped.<\/p>\n
Then I'd wrapped Paige carefully and taken her to the emergency room.<\/p>\n
The investigator wrote everything down.<\/p>\n
I watched her pen move.<\/p>\n
I kept thinking about that little wipe.<\/p>\n
The beige color on the white material.<\/p>\n
It had seemed so important when I first saw it.<\/p>\n
Then the bruise underneath had frightened me enough that I forgot almost everything else.<\/p>\n
The investigator asked whether I had a photograph of the area.<\/p>\n
I said no.<\/p>\n
She nodded.<\/p>\n
"The hospital has documented what was observed."<\/p>\n
I felt relieved again.<\/p>\n
At least the doctors had seen the remaining coating.<\/p>\n
At least I wasn't the only person who knew it existed.<\/p>\n
Then she asked about Kate's cosmetics.<\/p>\n
I looked at her.<\/p>\n
"What about them?"<\/p>\n
"Do you know whether your sister keeps makeup in Paige's diaper bag?"<\/p>\n
I shook my head.<\/p>\n
"I don't know."<\/p>\n
"Have you ever seen her use concealer on the baby?"<\/p>\n
"No."<\/p>\n
"Have you ever seen anyone put makeup on Paige?"<\/p>\n
"No."<\/p>\n
She wrote that down.<\/p>\n
I felt sick hearing the questions aloud.<\/p>\n
It was such a strange thing to be discussing.<\/p>\n
Makeup on a baby's injured thigh.<\/p>\n
I wished the words belonged to some other situation.<\/p>\n
Some misunderstanding.<\/p>\n
Something harmless.<\/p>\n
But the bruise was real.<\/p>\n
And the fracture was real.<\/p>\n
The investigator asked whether Kate usually carried cosmetics with her.<\/p>\n
I thought about my sister.<\/p>\n
She sometimes wore makeup.<\/p>\n
She might keep items in her purse.<\/p>\n
But I didn't know what she carried every day.<\/p>\n
"I can't tell you exactly what she keeps with her."<\/p>\n
The investigator nodded.<\/p>\n
"That's fine."<\/p>\n
She asked whether I'd noticed any unusual smell coming from the diaper bag.<\/p>\n
I thought about it.<\/p>\n
"No. The smell came when I opened Paige's clothes near her thigh."<\/p>\n
"Are you certain?"<\/p>\n
"That's when I noticed it."<\/p>\n
I didn't want to say I was certain about something I hadn't been paying attention to before.<\/p>\n
The investigator accepted the distinction.<\/p>\n
She asked whether I'd touched the beige coating with my fingers.<\/p>\n
"No."<\/p>\n
"Did you smell the wipe afterward?"<\/p>\n
"No. I noticed the floral smell before I wiped her."<\/p>\n
She wrote that down too.<\/p>\n
Then she asked whether I'd ever seen a similar cosmetic color on Kate.<\/p>\n
I hesitated.<\/p>\n
"I don't know."<\/p>\n
It seemed possible.<\/p>\n
But I couldn't identify the product.<\/p>\n
I wasn't a cosmetics expert.<\/p>\n
And I didn't want to accuse my sister based on a shade of beige.<\/p>\n
The investigator appeared satisfied with that answer.<\/p>\n
She explained that the hospital staff were documenting Paige's injuries and that other information might be reviewed as the investigation continued.<\/p>\n
I nodded.<\/p>\n
I tried to understand what she was telling me without jumping ahead.<\/p>\n
She wasn't saying they'd found the person responsible.<\/p>\n
She wasn't saying the diaper bag proved anything.<\/p>\n
She was simply gathering information.<\/p>\n
Still, I couldn't stop looking at the bag differently.<\/p>\n
It had moved with Paige from one home to another.<\/p>\n
I remembered Kate lifting it onto her shoulder.<\/p>\n
I remembered taking it from her.<\/p>\n
I remembered carrying it into the hospital.<\/p>\n
It was an ordinary object.<\/p>\n
But the day had made ordinary objects feel important.<\/p>\n
The investigator asked whether Kate had told me who cared for Paige the night before.<\/p>\n
"She said she and Ryan were both home."<\/p>\n
"Did she say anyone else was there?"<\/p>\n
"No."<\/p>\n
"Do you know whether anyone visited?"<\/p>\n
"No."<\/p>\n
"Do you know whether Paige was ever alone with Ryan?"<\/p>\n
I paused.<\/p>\n
I knew he was her father.<\/p>\n
Of course he cared for her.<\/p>\n
But I didn't know the exact routine from the night before.<\/p>\n
"I don't know what happened overnight."<\/p>\n
The investigator nodded.<\/p>\n
Then she asked whether I'd ever witnessed Ryan handle Paige roughly.<\/p>\n
I thought carefully.<\/p>\n
"No."<\/p>\n
"Have you ever seen Kate do that?"<\/p>\n
"No."<\/p>\n
"Have you ever been concerned about either of them caring for her?"<\/p>\n
I looked down.<\/p>\n
Before that Saturday, I hadn't imagined a situation like this.<\/p>\n
Kate was my sister.<\/p>\n
Ryan was Paige's father.<\/p>\n
They were the people I expected to protect her.<\/p>\n
"I hadn't seen anything like this before."<\/p>\n
The investigator waited.<\/p>\n
I continued.<\/p>\n
"I can't tell you what happened when I wasn't there."<\/p>\n
She nodded.<\/p>\n
"That's important."<\/p>\n
I appreciated that she didn't ask me to turn my fear into a story.<\/p>\n
I was already frightened of what the medical findings might mean.<\/p>\n
I didn't need to invent anything worse.<\/p>\n
After a while, she asked whether I had anything else to add.<\/p>\n
I remembered the morning phone call.<\/p>\n
The way Kate asked why I'd taken Paige to the hospital.<\/p>\n
The way she kept returning to teething.<\/p>\n
I described it again.<\/p>\n
Then I mentioned Kate's later statement that Paige had cried when she was picked up the night before.<\/p>\n
The investigator looked up.<\/p>\n
"When did you hear that?"<\/p>\n
"At the hospital, when the doctor was asking about the night."<\/p>\n
"Did your sister tell you that at the drop-off?"<\/p>\n
"No."<\/p>\n
"Did she explain why Paige cried when moved?"<\/p>\n
"No."<\/p>\n
She wrote the information down.<\/p>\n
I watched her for a moment.<\/p>\n
Then I asked something that had been bothering me.<\/p>\n
"Do you think Kate knew about the fracture?"<\/p>\n
The investigator looked at me.<\/p>\n
"We're still gathering information."<\/p>\n
I nodded.<\/p>\n
I had expected that answer.<\/p>\n
But I needed to ask.<\/p>\n
I wanted someone to tell me what my sister knew.<\/p>\n
I wanted someone to explain why no one had mentioned the pain.<\/p>\n
I wanted the uncertainty to stop.<\/p>\n
Instead, the investigator asked,<\/p>\n
"What do you know personally?"<\/p>\n
I looked down at my hands.<\/p>\n
"She didn't tell me Paige was injured."<\/p>\n
"Anything else?"<\/p>\n
"She said the baby was teething."<\/p>\n
I swallowed.<\/p>\n
"And I found bruising under makeup."<\/p>\n
The investigator nodded.<\/p>\n
"Those are the details you can speak to."<\/p>\n
I knew she was right.<\/p>\n
I couldn't testify to someone's thoughts.<\/p>\n
I couldn't explain choices I hadn't witnessed.<\/p>\n
I could only describe what had happened in front of me.<\/p>\n
That was beginning to feel both important and terribly limited.<\/p>\n
When the conversation ended, I returned to Paige's room.<\/p>\n
Kate wasn't there.<\/p>\n
Ryan was sitting near the window.<\/p>\n
The nurse was checking Paige.<\/p>\n
I moved to the other side of the bed.<\/p>\n
Ryan looked up.<\/p>\n
"Where were you?"<\/p>\n
"Speaking with the investigator."<\/p>\n
His expression tightened.<\/p>\n
"What did she ask?"<\/p>\n
I looked at him.<\/p>\n
"About the morning. About the diaper bag. About who was with Paige before she came to my house."<\/p>\n
He leaned back.<\/p>\n
"Did you tell her I was there?"<\/p>\n
I felt my stomach tighten.<\/p>\n
I hadn't expected that question.<\/p>\n
"Yes. You were in the car."<\/p>\n
Ryan looked toward Paige.<\/p>\n
He didn't answer.<\/p>\n
I waited.<\/p>\n
Then I said,<\/p>\n
"I told her what happened."<\/p>\n
He nodded once.<\/p>\n
I couldn't tell whether he was upset about being questioned or simply frightened.<\/p>\n
I reminded myself not to assume.<\/p>\n
The nurse finished checking Paige.<\/p>\n
She told us to let her know if we needed anything.<\/p>\n
Then she left.<\/p>\n
Ryan remained quiet.<\/p>\n
I sat beside Paige.<\/p>\n
I didn't want another argument.<\/p>\n
But I couldn't ignore how strange everything had become.<\/p>\n
That morning, Ryan had waited in the car while Kate brought me the baby.<\/p>\n
Now an investigator was asking about who had access to Paige before she entered my house.<\/p>\n
And Ryan was asking what I'd told her.<\/p>\n
I looked at Paige.<\/p>\n
Her little face was peaceful for the moment.<\/p>\n
I wished the whole day could have been as simple as sitting beside her while she slept.<\/p>\n
But the doctors were still evaluating her injuries.<\/p>\n
The investigator was still gathering information.<\/p>\n
And the diaper bag remained near the chair.<\/p>\n
I glanced at it.<\/p>\n
I wondered whether anything inside could help explain the makeup.<\/p>\n
Then I looked away.<\/p>\n
I didn't open it.<\/p>\n
I didn't move anything.<\/p>\n
I had answered the questions I could.<\/p>\n
I wanted the rest handled carefully.<\/p>\n
A few minutes later, Kate returned.<\/p>\n
She looked tired.<\/p>\n
She asked whether Paige had woken.<\/p>\n
I told her no.<\/p>\n
She sat beside the bed.<\/p>\n
For a little while, we were simply two sisters watching a baby rest.<\/p>\n
I wanted to hold on to that moment.<\/p>\n
But I knew the questions weren't going away.<\/p>\n
The bruise had been covered.<\/p>\n
The fracture hadn't been explained.<\/p>\n
The doctors were concerned about another bone.<\/p>\n
And none of us could return to the ordinary morning we'd expected.<\/p>\n
I touched Paige's hand.<\/p>\n
I remembered the investigator's question.<\/p>\n
What did I know personally?<\/p>\n
I knew my niece had been in pain.<\/p>\n
I knew I had found her injury.<\/p>\n
I knew the hospital had confirmed a fracture.<\/p>\n
And I knew that someone had applied makeup to an area that was bruised and swollen.<\/p>\n
Everything else still needed an answer.<\/p>\n
By the time the investigator returned, I had stopped trying to count the hours. Everything seemed to happen between medical checks. Someone came to examine Paige. Someone asked a question. … <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":37725,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-37736","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-insightdrama"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/insightdrama.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37736","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/insightdrama.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/insightdrama.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insightdrama.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insightdrama.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=37736"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/insightdrama.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37736\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":37756,"href":"https:\/\/insightdrama.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37736\/revisions\/37756"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insightdrama.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/37725"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/insightdrama.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=37736"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insightdrama.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=37736"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insightdrama.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=37736"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}